NFL Season Week 1: Tips & Preview
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GuyWhoLikesSport

Pendlebury and the Pies: Thank You and Goodbye 

Pendlebury and the Pies: Thank You and Goodbye 

• GuyWhoLikesSport
I remember going to Dusty Martin’s 300th game a couple of years ago.   Just like old times, hordes of Tiger fans flocked to the MCG to watch the person that lay at the heart of so much of our happiness over the previous five or so years play.   But it was about much more than watching him play again, which we’d all done a hundred times.   It was more about saying thank you. Thank you for all the memories you brought us. Thank you for the brightness you brought after a long fallow period.   He spoke to Jack Riewoldt over the loudspeaker after yet another…
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The Narrative Changers: The AFL Teams We Were Wrong About  

The Narrative Changers: The AFL Teams We Were Wrong About  

• GuyWhoLikesSport
Heading into this year, it felt like we kind of knew who the good teams would be and who the bad teams would be. For the most part, we were right.   Everyone expected Sydney to bounce back and they have, sitting pretty on top of the ladder. By the same token, Richmond was expected to be terrible.  Mission accomplished in that regard.   Even teams like the Saints, who most were lukewarm on despite a big season, have been worthy of that tepidness as they currently sit 9th and at 5-5.  But what are the teams that we were just wrong about? Who changed the narrative on their season?   Let’s look into it.  Melbourne …
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It’s Time to Talk about Alastair 

It’s Time to Talk about Alastair 

• GuyWhoLikesSport
Alastair Clarkson is one of the single best football coaches in my time watching footy.   After a demolition loss to Adelaide that simply shouldn’t be happening in year four of the Clarkson experiment at North Melbourne, after a season of “nearly” games that include close losses to Sydney and GWS, it might be time to reckon with the idea that he might be yesterday’s man.   Two things can be true.   But before heaping dirt on him, we have to remember what he inherited.   The two coaches before him – Rhyce Shaw and David Noble – had a nervous breakdown and were sincerely hated by the players…
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The Fatal Flaw in Every Top 4 Team 

The Fatal Flaw in Every Top 4 Team 

• GuyWhoLikesSport
There’s a clear standout top 4 teams in footy, and they currently occupy the top 4 on the ladder.   But nobody is impervious to weakness. Achilles had the heel, Superman had kryptonite, Tony Soprano had Livia Soprano.   What is the fatal flaw for each of the top 4?   Let’s find out  Sydney: Defending in general  You cannot make a with-ball case against Sydney. They’re ridiculous.   A fortnight ago, I would have said that if you can stop Justin McInerney and Angus Sheldrick’s corridor running lines you can stop Sydney, but both North Melbourne and Melbourne did that over the last two weeks and the Swans still…
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The Complicated Legacy of Michael Voss 

The Complicated Legacy of Michael Voss 

• GuyWhoLikesSport
Michael Voss has the look and feel of a man that is currently being tortured by his dream.   He looks like Fabio Wardley right at the end of his war with Danny Dubois, where he knew that his dream of being the champ was probably dead this time, but he’d still swing a few haymakers just in case a miracle happens.  He knows it’s a matter of when not if he’s given his marching orders, but he still has his boys fighting on grimly while they’re in his charge.   On Friday night, once again, they were competitive and carried a never say die…
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Explaining the AFL Premiership Metrics Through Devil Wears Prada Quotes

Explaining the AFL Premiership Metrics Through Devil Wears Prada Quotes

• GuyWhoLikesSport
I saw The Devil Wears Prada 2 the other night. My official review is that I loved the original.   To celebrate the second one coming out and at the very least not being the worst legacy sequel in living memory (Anchorman 2), I thought I’d run through Andrew Whelan’s premiership metrics using lines from the original, which is one of the most quotable movies since Goodfellas.   But what are the premiership metrics? The premiership metrics are a series of numbers that have been mostly closely associated with winning the premiership over the last 15 years.   Essentially, the numbers combine stats that capture your performance with and…
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Agent of Chaos: How Connor Macdonald Destroys Structures 

Agent of Chaos: How Connor Macdonald Destroys Structures 

• GuyWhoLikesSport
The season needed some bangers for Round 8 to distract from one of the AFL’s worst weeks in living memory.  Once again, the game bailed out the competition across all the games on Thursday and Friday night, but really the whole round. Try as they might, the AFL’s consistent ineptitude isn’t enough to drag the best game in the world down with them.  But the game I want to focus is the one that set the tone for a bonkers run of bangers: Collingwood v Hawthorn  Dylan Moore’s goal after the siren drove Hawthorn to a draw against the Pies, who remain the very best in…
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Collingwood, Richmond, Essendon, and Carlton: A 5 Year Outlook Analysis 

Collingwood, Richmond, Essendon, and Carlton: A 5 Year Outlook Analysis 

• GuyWhoLikesSport
Four of the five biggest traditional Melbourne clubs are either in, or appear to be careening towards, significant rebuilds.  All appear certain to miss the top six and only Collingwood is likely to make the wildcard, particularly given that Carlton has been seriously incentivised to lose so they can get access to Cody Walker at pre inflation prices.  Clearly the AFL’s chicanery could lead to Carlton getting a better outcome than they would have got because they could get Walker and a pick at the end of the first round, though they’ll probably confect a way to get out of that…
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Melbourne and the Myth of Conservatism  

Melbourne and the Myth of Conservatism  

• GuyWhoLikesSport
I went down to the G on Friday night to watch Richmond get eviscerated by Melbourne. Before the game, I was talking to another Richmond supporter friend and I was doing my usual thing, complaining about how Adem Yze’s conservative game style makes me want to spew.  My friend, another Richmond supporter, pushed back. He asked “well isn’t it possible that he’s trying to set a defensive foundation up first, especially with how short-handed we are? And even then, Melbourne has just released the shackles and have no structure to fall back on.”   We continued the discussion and eventually watched the game where we saw Melbourne, predictably, spread hard out of contests and essentially destroy…
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Equalisation Anxiety: The Case Against Panic in the AFL

Equalisation Anxiety: The Case Against Panic in the AFL

• GuyWhoLikesSport
Remember early this season and for most of last year, when footy had an equalisation crisis?  That led to a mostly conservative AFL commentariat talking about helping lift the teams off the bottom like they’re Zohran Mamdani. Kane Cornes, he of “Sean Darcy is fat” fame, said earlier this year that “Every decision the AFL make from here on in has to be with the end goal in mind to make the competition as even as possible.”   Soon enough we’ll be teaching critical race theory and taxing the rich. Before we get to CGT discounts though, we’re talking about making wholesale changes to the draft and everything else around it to try and make…
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