This is your weekly dose of NRL truth-telling, as tipster and rugby league raconteur Nick Tedeschi tears through the good, the bad and the indefensible, with absolutely no regard for bruised egos.
Which Seinfeld Character is Your Team?
The greatest show ever made, Seinfeld, kicked off its run in July of 1989. To celebrate its all-important 37-year anniversary, here is the Seinfeld character that best represents your club:
Penrith – Jerry: Always come out with a trophy and the win.
Dolphins – J Peterman: Eccentric club that is building success and marching to their own drum (or trumpet, as it is).
Souths – Uncle Leo: Cody Walker is Uncle Leo – old and cranky who is easily stirred up into overreaction, be it a stern word or failing to say hello.
Manly – Puddy: Good-looking on paper but can rarely be relied upon with very little often going on between the ears, be it with their recruitment or their on-field play.
Sydney Roosters – Mr Pitt: Wealthy and extremely pedantic who seem to operate in a different social sphere while making up their own rules, be it the salary cap or eating a Snickers with a knife and fork.
Wests Tigers – Babu Bhatt: The Tigers are easy to follow trends and nearly always come out on the wrong side of the ledger.
Parramatta – Lloyd Braun: The club lives in a fantasy world where any recent success is fabricated and the club has been nothing but a disappointment to all associated with them.
Canberra – Library Cop Bookman: Angry and holding onto grudges from many years ago, known for dramatic interrogations/post-match press conferences.
Melbourne – The Soup Nazi: The Storm have long been extremely dictatorial with their rules, finding players to adapt to their culture or showing them the door.
Canterbury – Crazy Joe Davola: Lunatics with one who dresses up as a clown and leaves his door open to encourage intruders while the other signs a plethora of utilities, refuses to play a halfback and has a GM of Football use his many platforms to spread untruths and deceit.
Cronulla – Poppie: Both refuse change – one with their roster, the other with their pizza – and end up urinating in their pants at the worst possible time – on someone else’s couch or in the finals.
Brisbane – Newman: Always plotting, always dreaming big, always with a long-list of enemies and personal grievances and a deep disdain for hard work.
North Queensland – Kenny Bania: Fancy themselves as the real deal but stick stubbornly to bad ideas like ovaltine as a comedy act/Todd Payten as a head coach.
Gold Coast – Dugan: Co-worker of Elaine at Peterman’s who is completely forgettable and totally irrelevant.
New Zealand – The Bubble Boy: Spent covid isolated from their friends and family and have forever been isolated from premiership success.
Newcastle – Russell Dalrymple: The Knights became obsessed with Dylan Brown the same was Dalrymple did with Elaine.
St George Illawarra – Mickey Abbot: Neither like being referred to in diminutive terms – Abbott because of his physical stature, or the Dragons because of their rich history despite their sordid recent past.
Officiating Leadership at the NRL Needs To Go
Less than 10 days after Queensland were robbed of a try because Max Plath was deemed to be offside by the barest of margins, Manly were gifted a try when Reuben Garrick was at least two metres offside in what was clear and obvious to everyone. Penrith were robbed of an opportunity to steal a win against Brisbane by an utterly absurd Bunker decision to call a mutual infringement. North Queensland were given a ridiculous try when Morgan Knowles forced an error that was a clear knock-on. The Dragons were stiffed time and time again by some obscene refereeing and touch-judging, none worse than the try off a pass that was at least a metre forward – which is about the distance the touch judge was from the play – though Valentine Holmes turning to chase and being penalised for it by The Bunker nearly topped it. In the NRLW, hip drops that would have resulted in send offs six weeks ago in the men are not even seeing sin bins. Refereeing is not an easy job but sitting in The Bunker sure as hell is and they mess it up in the most egregious, inconsistent, self-immolating ways. .
Ryan Fox Delivers Rugby League A Major
Rugby League fans winning majors is incredibly rare with just Ryan Fox becoming just the third in the last 20 years following Jason Day and Cameron Smith. Fox was absolutely magnificent in winning the Open Championship with a birdie on the last. Despite an unsettling connection to rugby union, Fox is a lover of the Warriors. His win is up there with that of Cameron Smith such is his likability, humility and love of Rugby League.
The Willie M Team of the Week
This week’s team of battlers and bottle-job merchants:
- Jahream Bula (Tig)
- Sunia Turuva (Tig)
- Mat Feagai (Dra)
- Jack Wighton (Sou)
- Setu Tu (Dra)
- Jarome Luai (Tig)
- Jamal Fogarty (Man)
- Taniela Paseka (Man)
- Reed Mahoney (NQ)
- Griffin Neame (NQ)
- Oryn Keeley (Mel)
- Jacob Laban (NZ
- Trent Loiero (Mel)
———————————————————- - Josh Feledy (Man)
- Lachlan Hubner (Sou)
- Nathan Brown (Man)
- Luciano Leilua (Dra)
——————————————————-
Coach: Benji Marshall (Tig)
Referee Gradings
This week’s gradings:
- Todd Smith (C-)
- Ashley Klein (D)
- Gerard Sutton (C-)
- Wyatt Raymond (C-)
- Jarrod Cole (D-)
- Tyson Brough (C-)
- Adam Gee (C+)
- Grant Atkins (C-)
The 2026 Field Goal Update – 20
Sadly no field goals were kicked – keeping in line with the lack of field goals in Round 20 which sat at zero in 1986, one in 1996, two in 2006 and two in 2016.
Fun Fact #1
Shalom Suaso and Meg Ward have both played 10 NRLW games and never tasted defeat.
Fun Fact #2
Jasmin Strange is a remarkable 35-4 over the course of her NRLW career while Kerri Johnson is 15-1.
Fun Fact #3
Inaugural Broncos NRLW coach Paul Dyer coached the club to an unbeaten title in the competition’s first year and has never coached again.
Rumour Mill
Joey Manu is set to return to Rugby League with the PNG Chiefs set to sign the former Rooster. Gehamat Shibasaki is set to move to the Perth Bears in 2027 after failing to reach a deal with the Broncos. Canterbury half Sean O’Sullivan is set to move to Super League with big-spending Wakefield Trinity the front-runner to snare him. Jack Howarth is likely to move to Parramatta next season
The Coaching Crosshairs
St George Illawarra’s laughable “process” to find their next coach is down to three with interim Dean Young, former club legend Ben Hornby and former club legend Trent Barrett the three remaining. The process looks like it was just simply call around former players who led the club at some point and take a guess – even after they tried that last time with Jason Ryles and were laughed out of the building. What the Dragons need most is leadership. They also need authority to come from outside of the club. Young has done a sound job in toughening up the Dragons – and will get the job. Hornby is a respected-enough assistant. But speaking with Barrett shows just where the Saints problems lie – and it is the morons in the front office and on the board. Barrett is 38-83 in premiership games, the 12th worst record of any coach with 50 games in the history of the premiership. Phil Economidis is the only coach in the NRL era with a worse record and no coach with 100-plus games has a worse record. To even entertain the idea of Barrett is an indictment on the Dragons when the likes of John Strange, Brad Arthur and Paul Rowley were not seriously considered because they did not play for the Dragons.
Moronic Coaching Decision of the Week
Craig Bellamy is the smartest coach in the history of the game and the Storm have unquestionably been gutted by injury but the six-man bench was designed to give a club coverage to their backline if a specialist went down. Bellamy named a bench with five running forwards and a hooker. When Will Warbrick went down, the Storm had to move a backrower to an edge and if the Roosters didn’t play so recklessly arrogant they would have been exposed time and time again. It was a major failing from Bellamy and the club not to bring someone in from outside their Top 30 to play as backs on the bench.
Watch It
Rugby League has been sanitised and it is probably for the best that genuine fighting is a thing of the past but those with a nostalgic bent for seeing two big men go toe-to-toe will enjoy this trip down memory lane when Jamie Peacock battered Josh Perry in the 2009 World Club Challenge. Watch it below.
