Rejected Super Bowl LIX Markets

Rejected Super Bowl LIX Markets

James Caughlin

While we have no shortage of Super Bowl markets on offer at Neds, whether it is on player stats, the halftime show or the Gatorade shower, the punters will have plenty of choice.

But like anything in this field of work, not every idea was able to get over the line and make the final cut.

However, with a bit of help from the bookies, we are able to reveal some of those brilliant ideas that, for one reason or another we just couldn’t quite run.

Whether it was an inability to find the right price, the correct way to frame it or just something that a lawyer would have a conniption over if we actually offered it, these ideas were too good to not see the light of day in some context.

Anytime Player to Say “Nobody Believed In Us”

It’s the catchcry of every player at this time of year.

Despite being heavily supported throughout the season and picked by many to win the Super Bowl, you just know some player with an inferiority complex is going to claim that they were going against the entire world.

City of New Orleans Says “We’ll Take Our Chances With The Electricity Grid”

I mean… it’s not like the last time the city hosted a Super Bowl there was an issue with the lights going out.

Behind the scenes there has to be all sorts of action going on to ensure there is no repeat of that calamity this time around.

Jordan Mailata’s Sporting Background to be Misidentified

Here in Australia we know there are a lot of differences between rugby league and union.

Unfortunately they have not quite worked out the difference between 13 and 15 in America and Mailata is certain to be called a “rugby player” during the game.

Just grin and bear it.

Anytime Celebrity Fan Tracker

*NOTE: Fan must be shown on Australian broadcast to be paid as a winner*

With the recent success of both teams they have had plenty of celebrity fans come out of the woodwork, with some more rusted on than others.

Kansas City has guys like Paul Rudd and Eric Stonestreet on the roster with the latter making an appearance at the Super Bowl four years ago.

Meanwhile Philadelphia has its share of celebrity fans with the likes of Bradley Cooper and Rob McElaney front and centre during this playoff run.

Wonder if we get a Will Smith sighting during the game as well?

Total Travis Kelce Accents Used During The Game

Unless you were a very dedicated Kelce fan you might not know that the brothers grew up in Ohio and that would not have been clear just off his interviews.

Kelce can pull off almost as many accents as Meryl Streep (at about five times the volume).

Wherever he needs to sound like he’s from, Brooklyn, Texas, Minnesota, Canada or even Tasmania, he can pull it off.

Probably won’t be getting a role on the reboot of The Sopranos with this line though.

Total Times Tom Brady Stops Talking Mid-Sentence

The greatest quarterback of all time (for now) is far from the greatest broadcaster of all time, suffering some rough moments behind the mic.

He’s still learning how long he can talk for between plays and when to come in with lead caller Kevin Burkhardt.

That has lead to more than a few moments where he will trail off mid sentence, perhaps starting a thought and not knowing where it was going.

Unfortunately our traders just could not agree on a high enough number for Brady’s broadcasting foibles.

Patrick Mahomes To Decline A Penalty Because The Refs Got It Wrong

It’s been a topic of contention throughout the season, especially in the playoffs.

Yeah Mahomes gets more than his share of favourable calls, he’s the face of the league and that’s what happens when you’re the big dog.

However in a rare moment of clarity, he might go to a ref and say “hey that guy didn’t hit me, do you want to pick up that roughing the passer flag?”

The odds of that would be astronomical.

Roger Goodell Gets Booed During Trophy Presentation

Every year, without fail the Commissioner of the league gets booed by the crowd.

There is no price too short for this one.

Here in Australia we tend to go after the politicians and other hangers on who work their way into the presentation ceremonies.

Not so much in America, just the guy running the entire league.